God's Time and Plans

Growing older has had an incredibly positive impact.  The hindsight vision of God’s hand of plan and grace is mind-blowing and love-knowing when you realize where and how He has moved through your life.  It also eases concerns for tomorrow.  He’s already there.

We are preparing for ministry work in Durham, England. 

This is new. 

We are in our 50’s!

Jeremiah 29:11 is a popular verse and is often said alone. This is the King James translation and follows truer with the Hebrew in this verse. “ For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, saith the LORD, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you an expected end.”  In other translations “thoughts” are translated to “plans.”  “An expected end” is translated in some as “hope.” 

An “expected end” is comforting and a promise to hold to.  It’s a certainty.  He’s there.

What is often overlooked is that these words are said to the Hebrew people in exile in Babylon and God has just said that they will be in bondage for another 70 years!  Even through the hardship, He has thoughts for them, plans that are for peaceful good.  When we feel like we are in the midst of struggles, hardships, even captivity keeping you from being or doing who or where you want to be, God is saying He is there and He will answer as His work and plans unfold.

The gonging of this reality hit me recently.  I was driving the car and marveling over an upcoming ministry trip, how God miraculously brought the request for us to go to England.  Also, the way God miraculously provided the means to do it. 
 We had asked for financial assistance from people because we were being asked to come when we did not have the means ourselves. Some help came, but it remained out of our reach.  God wanted to show that He was in charge and it is Him that we count on, not other people.  Miraculously, for one day, the price of the ticket flights dropped by $1,000.  We locked them in.  What seemed like God’s plan was coming together through Him.

On another day I was reflecting at the miracle saving of our marriage five years ago and the changes in my heart and my husband’s.  The new gifting I since then  received to understand His Word and be able to share it grows stronger every day in me.  All of it is only of God’s doing.  I marveled.  Now we are going to England to minister!

Almost high with joy, I asked the LORD what was He thinking when I was only twelve years old when He decided to fill me with the fullness of His Spirit at that age?  Instantly, a memory popped into my head.  I had written a story in sixth grade.  My teacher had called me in early to talk to me privately about it.  She encouraged me and said how good it was and that her husband was an English teacher and he was sharing it with his high school students.  I only remember this at all because she had taken time to call me aside to let me know and spoke well about it, encouraging me.

The story itself, I don’t remember, but I remember what had started it out.  I had written about a vision I had.  I was so young and didn’t really know what a vision was, but I wrote about it.  It was the opening and setting of the story.  I can still remember the vision vividly, but not the story I made up. I even think I tried to paint a water color picture of it that went with the story.

Walking down a city sidewalk, it was raining.  I was looking down at the water splashing around my feet with every step that I took as I hurried along holding my umbrella.  I was an adult woman.  Suddenly, a loud bonging started to sound.  I turned around and looked up to where the sound was coming from.  The clock tower stood tall behind me as it rang out through the pouring rain.  It was Big Ben.  My vision was in London, England.

As a twelve year old girl in the 1970’s, my childhood knowledge of England was centered around Davy Jones from the Monkees, The Beatles and Mary Poppins.  Little did I know that I would marry a man from England and that he would be a professional soccer player.  He would be the door way that would open a path forty years later.

My life didn’t stay attentive to God following those powerful, early, teen years.  But, God remained attentive and faithful to me.  He had a plan and His Call had been made long ago.  I never denied Who He is, but I denied living a life I knew He wanted. 

When the pregnancy of our daughter took place, that life impacted me.  I had an overwhelming desire  to begin living the life I knew was better.  I was moved by His power of creating and the sorrow for past choices had taken its toll.  I needed Him to give me peace, joy and hope and I knew His love for me through all of His mercy and blessings despite how I ignored Him.

The years that followed were up, down, and sometimes upside-down.  Surviving it all with faith in tact and growing stronger in it has been the training field for today.  A forty year preparation of experiences to know Him through it all and find Him loving, merciful, faithful and miraculously powerful is what I want others to know for themselves, too.  That He can take a moment and suddenly everything changes.  I even wrote a book about it.

Death to resurrection.  For us, it was our marriage.

He is life.

A new life.

So as the rains of His Spirit pour out and God’s time rings out for me to walk with Him in England, I have been shown the power of His good thoughts, places and times.  The knowing of this gives a boldness to move in certainty that He is with me and He will accomplish what He has set out to do. 

Look at all of your own struggles and things you have endured through His grace and power.  See Him in it with you.  If you don’t know or aren’t sure where He was, ask Him to show you.  Open yourself up to those thoughts and memories.  And when they come, acknowledge that it is by His Spirit that He has shown you.  Through the things He has helped you make it through is how you know Him best. 

He could have been your provider or protector, hope, healer, strength, guide, counselor, savior, comforter or all of them and more.  Look for Him.  He promises that if you seek Him with all your heart you will find Him. He sends others to be His hands here, too.  Are there people that were there at the right time for you in your life?

You have not been forsaken.  You have been allowed to know Him more.  His plan has always been to have a relationship with you. 

You will seek Me and find Me when you search for Me with all your heart.  Jeremiah 29:13

 

The Shame of Shame

 

 

“There’s no hope for me.”

“It’s too late for me.”

“God couldn’t possibly love someone like me.”

 

These are words you may have heard or may have said. 

Self  loathing.

Not allowing yourself enough grace to receive grace.

We shame ourselves over the shame of what we know, have done or thought to do in its stark contrast of the perfection of God’s glory that stands so pure and beautiful and good.

We think we don’t deserve or can bear to be in the knowledge of our own evil in the light of His knowing.

We try to hide.

We put up a wall. A covering. Something to block a relationship with others. With God.

They can’t know and I don’t deserve the love. The kindness.

The grace.

Sometimes we cover our own eyes.

But, His knowing is bathed in love, in mercy and in forgiveness. 

In the Garden, the LORD came to them.  They hid from Him as He looked for them. They covered themselves.  They could not bear to be bare.  Shame. They made their separation through shame.

Genesis 3:8 “…hid themselves from the presence of the LORD God…”

They knew good and evil.  Sin. The contrast was shame to them.

In His mercy, God in that moment called to them.

Sin had entered the world and God had a plan.  His plan was and is for life. Sin would meet an end. Sin would not be permitted to live forever as the Tree of Life was guarded to keep from giving sin an eternity. 

With every curse that came with the sin, God would redeem through the life and blood of Himself in our presence as Christ. His death for the wages of sin and His life resurrected is our life-given grace for eternity. 

A relationship…for eternity.

 Shame taken.

Grace given.

 For Life.

Relationship and Love.

 Just as we are because of the way He is.

Don’t let shame be your covering. Sometimes dropping that covering is a “cold and broken Hallelujah.” But He Himself is your clothing.

 Galatians 3:27 For all of you who were baptized into Christ have clothed yourselves with Christ

 

Drop the shame and wrap in His robe of love and forgiveness. 

Grace looks so good on you.

He loves to have you in His presence.

You are loved.



A Nightmare, A Dream

 

 

Alarmed by a strange dream, I woke the next morning and thought about it. The symbolism began to be revealed.

I was floating along in a crystal, clear river.  It was beautiful and lush with green foliage along the banks. Healthy, aquatic plants were growing and it appeared to be perfect.  Then, while floating with the current, there was a huge head of a fish that had been dead for a long time.  It was mostly decomposed as it floated with the last bits of rotted flesh lifting from it  There were no longer eyes in the sockets.  I was grossed out and I shoved it away from me with the wooden pole I had in my hand. 

Having been disrupted by my shove and coming out from inside the cavity of the rotting fish head, were many beautiful, small, young fish.  They were a different kind. They were vibrant, alive, clean and striped in colors like a rainbow.  I shoved the disgusting head further away and they chased after it to go back inside and “feed.”  I shoved the head again and the young ones were exposed.  I was so bothered that they attempted to return to the decomposed head  and I began to smack the water over the top of them to keep them from returning to the rotting head again, long enough for them to see what was all around them.  The river had so much to offer them in way of life and good things to eat and beautiful places to dwell.  I woke up grossed out and upset.

The setting, river and flow was spiritual and of God’s essence and perfect creation and life.  The small, living fish were like young ones made with promise, given all that they need to live in ways of good and beautiful things out in the light of God and all that lives.  Instead, they chose to feed on the “mind” of a fish that had been before them.  It had been another fish that was bigger and died and rotted. Mortal.  They were living in the dark, inside of this dead head and feeding off of it.

It made me think of the young ones that follow men’s thoughts and feed off of them. Feeding off of men that had maybe one time been great or highly regarded. But, each one of these great minds met the same mortality of death and decay. By living in and off of it they miss the fullness of their spiritual life.

That’s where the creation all around them was being ignored.  That the life and fullness of  life through the Holy Spirit  were being left because they didn’t understand how much promise they were given Spiritually and in life all around them from the Giver of Life.  They had been given so much, but they were not living in it. 

The one great mind of Christ, esteemed to at least have been very wise and good by the least of believers,  never saw decay. 

 In His resurrection and power He stood alone as God with us.

Psalm 16:9-11 NLT

Therefore my heart is glad and my glory rejoices; My flesh also will dwell securely. 10For You will not abandon my soul to Sheol; Nor will You allow Your Holy One to undergo decay. 11You will make known to me the path of life; In Your presence is fullness of joy; In Your right hand there are pleasures forever.

Acts 13:35  So it is also stated elsewhere: "'You will not let your holy one see decay.'

John 2:22 NIV  After he was raised from the dead, his disciples recalled what he had said. Then they believed the scripture and the words that Jesus had spoken.

1 Corinthians 2:15-16 NIV  But he who is spiritual appraises all things, yet he himself is appraised by no one. 16 For WHO HAS KNOWN THE MIND OF THE LORD, THAT HE WILL INSTRUCT HIM? But we have the mind of Christ.

This is Matthew Henry’s Commentary on 1 Corinthians 2:15-16 taken from Biblehub.com.

“This is most clear testimony, both to the real Godhead and the distinct person of the Holy Spirit. The apostles were not guided by worldly principles. They had the revelation of these things from the Spirit of God, and the saving impression of them from the same Spirit. These things they declared in plain, simple language, taught by the Holy Spirit, totally different from the affected oratory or enticing words of man's wisdom. The natural man, the wise man of the world, receives not the things of the Spirit of God. The pride of carnal reasoning is really as much opposed to spirituality, as the basest sensuality. The sanctified mind discerns the real beauties of holiness, but the power of discerning and judging about common and natural things is not lost. But the carnal man is a stranger to the principles, and pleasures, and actings of the Divine life. The spiritual man only, is the person to whom God gives the knowledge of his will. How little have any known of the mind of God by natural power! And the apostles were enabled by his Spirit to make known his mind. In the Holy Scriptures, the mind of Christ, and the mind of God in Christ, are fully made known to us. It is the great privilege of Christians, that they have the mind of Christ revealed to them by his Spirit. They experience his sanctifying power in their hearts, and bring forth good fruits in their lives.”

I believe the smooth, wooden pole I held was representative of the cross of Christ as I stirred up the waters of His Spirit to keep the promise-filled young ones from going back to filling themselves on the minds of those who cannot compare to the Holy and risen mind of Christ.  It is my prayer and dream that many would see and understand in ways they had not before and live in the fullness of life. 

John 16:13 ESV  When the Spirit of truth comes, he will guide you into all the truth, for he will not speak on his own authority, but whatever he hears he will speak, and he will declare to you the things that are to come.



Fair Weather

 

 

 

Battling a new cold-snap here in Minnesota following several glorious days of spring warmth, the hearts and hopes are dashed that winter feels like it is back. Some are angered. Idle threats of moving on to someplace else start to pop up. Our son groaned as I pulled out his winter coat again. But, as soon as the sun shines and a warm breeze comes, we are out reveling in this place of Minnesota and where we call “home.” 

Fair weather fans of sports teams. 

I admit I am one.  Ultimately, I don’t have much faith in some of my home teams, but when they are doing well I cheer along as if I am one of them.  True fans, through thick and thin, look bewildered when it comes to my late cheers.  And then a loss…and I’m gone. 

Many relationships begin to reveal the fair weather hearts.  There are fair weather men and all-weather women and vice-versa.  How many people have walked away from relationships because it wasn’t as fun as it was before? Or, hardships come, lack of jobs, hopelessness, illness, dismay and the plans desired don’t occur. “It must be because of you,” we think. “You don’t make me feel as good as before.” And we walk.  

I see it in faith and relationship with God over and over again.  I admit to having had my days of doubt because things were hard, or quiet and I felt alone.  Where was God?  It’s the mindset of, “What have you done for me lately?”  Our faith becomes about being self satisfied. But, how flimsy and sorrowful that time is.  It is a faith that is weak and quickly loses hope.  But what it really has lost are the eyes of how good God is. 

In every hard time, loss and sorrow, He promises a blessing.

Matthew 5:3-12

3“Blessed are the poor in spirit,

for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.

4Blessed are those who mourn,

for they will be comforted.

5Blessed are the meek,

for they will inherit the earth.

6Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness,

for they will be filled.

7Blessed are the merciful,

for they will be shown mercy.

 8Blessed are the pure in heart,

for they will see God.

9Blessed are the peacemakers,

for they will be called children of God.

10Blessed are those who are persecuted because of righteousness,

for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.

11“Blessed are you when people insult you, persecute you and falsely say all kinds of evil against you because of me. 12Rejoice and be glad, because great is your reward in heaven, for in the same way they persecuted the prophets who were before you.

 Good will come to those who love him and are called according to His purpose. Romans 8:28.  When you surrender to the knowledge that He has promised to never leave you or forsake you, every situation is going to be used by Him to draw you nearer to Him. He shows you His presence and power and desire to know Him in all things. 

 A flame is brightest in the dark. 

Taking our eyes off of ourselves or just opening our eyes and onto Him is the starting place.  Reflecting on Who He has been in your life.  I have my life.  He is my Father and Creator of this life in me.  I breathe, my heart beats and it is all given to me by Him.  It is as basic as that and then so much more.

Asking to see Him in my life a while ago when I was going through some harder times, He gave me a video snap shot of all the good He has given to me.  None of those things He had given was I able to do, it is all of Him.  How could I doubt?  But, I did.  And, again in His faithfulness, He reminded me of it all.  I just had to be willing to look at every bad that has happened and how He has given and I received a way through it and how later, more good and a stronger faith came that could only come from Him.  From there He taught that He will be there in hard times, that He will provide what I need, even better faith.  It strengthened my faith greatly.

When I falter it is because I start to look to myself instead of His promises and power.

In prayer recently the LORD said the words, “Messiah Jireh.”  I didn’t really know what it meant exactly.  I recognized the words in familiarity.  I always think of Jesus as Messiah and thought more of the word “Savior.”  In Hebrew, Messiah really means Anointed One.  Jireh means provide. 

The first place that the word Jireh was used is in Genesis 22:14. It is following when Abraham was told to sacrifice his son Isaac and Abraham was not going to withhold it because he knew God would provide the ram or sacrifice.  Whatever way the sacrifice was to be, it was of God and Abraham had faith in Who God is, letting go of his plans for God’s plans in what would have been painful obedience and faith-filled trust that no matter what, God is good. 

When he was ready to raise the knife he was told to stop.  There in the thicket was the ram, caught by its horns.  Genesis 22:13-14   Abraham looked up and there in a thicket he saw a ram caught by its horns. He went over and took the ram and sacrificed it as a burnt offering instead of his son. 14So Abraham called that place The Lord Will Provide. And to this day it is said, “On the mountain of the Lord it will be provided.”

Messiah Jireh.  The Anointed One Provides. He provided our sacrifice, He provides for our faith, He provides the fulfillment of every promise, He provides everlasting love and life. He provides all that we need in good weather and bad.  He is there. Have faith.

Romans 4:3 ESV For what does the Scripture say? “Abraham believed God, and it was counted to him as righteousness.”

“Jesus sought the lowly place so He could lift you up to the highest place.  He was rejected by men so you could be accepted by God.  He was acquainted with grief so that you could be comforted with the love that knows no limits and has no end” ~ Roy Lessin  Meet Me In the Meadow.com

He loves us at our worst.  He loves us when we don’t give Him fair weather days.  He loves us and gives us His best.  His love.  Always.

Jeremiah 31:3  the LORD appeared to him from far away. I have loved you with an everlasting love; therefore I have continued my faithfulness to you.

Believing is committing.  Committing to His good and perfect plan even amidst what seems dark. 

Committing in fair weather and in bad because He Is Good.

Because He loves.

Messiah Jireh.

The Anointed One Provides.



To Be

 

In order to let the dust settle, it has to stop being kicked around.

This world of networking in every way imagined has us stirred up like never before.  The bombardment of other peoples’ ideas, good or bad, has us in constant mental motion. 

Reading observations, realizations, inspirations, frustrations, persuasions, exasperation's, elation's and on; I got to the point where I wanted to shake the dust off from it all and for a bit,
just be. 

Be in this moment.

Be nothing more.

Be nothing less. 

Be.

That’s it.

And I found that place of peace. Quiet. And love. Just as I am.

A friend shared this with me and it came back to mind.  It’s Psalm 46:10a  and it is said in a slow way reaching the one word, “Be.”

“Be still and know that I am God.”

“Be still and know that I am.”

“Be still and know that I.”

“Be still and know that.”

“Be still and know.”

“Be still and.”

“Be still.”

“Be.”

Taking a moment to reach the  simplicity of peace that draws Him near.

Who Do You Say I Am?

Lately, I have observed in a much greater degree, the friction of opinion, especially in the Church.  One article after another has Christian bloggers and article writers writing what’s wrong with this person’s doctrine or what is lacking or what is being over-stated.  Imagining an observer reading some of this who doesn’t believe or know for themselves, I can see where they are tossed about by some of the waves.

Every Bible teacher is coming from a place of interpretation. They interpret the way they personally see Jesus because it is their viewpoint coming from their place in life, what they've read, experienced and how they perceive it.

Joyce Meyer had a lot of abuse and anger in her past.  She teaches very directly and believes emotions are harmful; probably because of the hurt she encountered through her own life and the issues she has had with anger.  She knows the saving grace of God and His healing and His power and the transformation He makes in lives by helping her get a handle on anger and forgiveness.  Hers is an amazing story and she serves Him because she’s grateful and she loves Him.

Joel Osteen is one happy camper and he received a whopping ministry, church and growth.  He sees God as an awesome provider beyond his wildest dreams.  Of course he’s going to teach on the endless supply of God’s abundance.  It landed on him like a ton of gold from a golden dump truck.  His father passed away and he inherited a ministry more than he ever thought he was capable or worthy of, except he knew he loved the LORD and the ministry took off.  He is grateful and wowed.

Teachers teach from what they know and how they know the LORD.  It is relational and it comes from the place and way He impacted them most from the view of where they came from and who they are because of Him.

It also comes from the way the LORD revealed Himself to them.

Some Bible teachers have great knowledge and they are wired to detail and the letter and study and teach from a knowledge base of writings.  Some teach from ways of experience and relationship through His Spirit.  Those tend to be less detail minded and more open to the anything-type of move of His; teaching more on love, joy, peace, hope, miracles and encouragement.  I enjoy learning from those who teach a combination of both.

I confess that I watch and listen to probably 3-4 sermons/ messages a day.  It has been more than that at times.  I enjoy learning the perspectives and views from a variety of people, knowing that we all see Jesus from how He has revealed Himself.  My criteria to consider their teaching is that they acknowledge Christ as LORD, His death and resurrection and we have need of His salvation that was given out of His love for us with the gift of eternal life.

In listening and watching them, I see how He loves them.  Every teacher is imperfect and yet moved to proclaim Him.  I see His grace in their lives and I also notice when their words drift from that grace.  Then, I pray for them that they would make their focus back to His face and who He is for them so that they can best use the platform they have been given. 

Some people become big followers of a person or teacher.  I understand that.  There are people I better receive from than others.  Right now, I’m a fan of Creflo Dollar and his Bible teaching.  I had my Joseph Prince days of incredible grace teaching, Beth Moore days of insight and womanly-heart teaching, Joyce Meyer’s no-nonsense, Joel Osteen’s  kid-at-Christmas joy and Christine Caine’s Holy Spirit guided slur of sentences that cut to the marrow while said through her delightful, little grin.

Teachers of Hebrew have been enticing to me as well. God Himself  has been teaching me a bit of Hebrew. (I write words I believe He is telling me and He will sometimes run a line of Hebrew in which I write it down phonetically and then have to look it up to translate it.  He has also said lines I discovered were Aramaic, Sanskrit and once German. It keeps my ears tuned and I’m learning. I love it when He does that.)

Remember to pray for your Bible teachers.  They are people.  Don’t let a teacher be your end-all-be-all, but find your own learning and insights from the Great Teacher. 

 Your relationship with Jesus is a view like no one else’s and it is meant for you from Him.  Let Him show you that Himself and let His Spirit guide you to Who He is for you.  It is your place of His grace and love for you that reaches your soul for exactly the way you need and then some. 

Don’t put a teacher’s teaching above Jesus’.  Guard yourself with that.  Keep your heart recognizing Bible teachers for the full gospel of Jesus as LORD and savior.  Love them, encourage them and pray for them that they will continue to know Him more  personally every day.  We can't teach what we don't know.

We will always have different takes here and there because everyone has their own view.  We also have our own relationship with Jesus.  Let’s love one another as we grow every day nearer to Him and asking for His truth.

Sometimes He will show you Himself through others, through His Word and in your life.  Figure out who you say that He is.  He calls us to that and it is that moment of one on One when it comes down to you and Him.

Luke 9:18-20 ESV

18Once when Jesus was praying in private and his disciples were with him, he asked them, “Who do the crowds say I am?”

19They replied, “Some say John the Baptist; others say Elijah; and still others, that one of the prophets of long ago has come back to life.”

20“But what about you?” he asked. “Who do you say I am?”

Peter answered, “God’s Messiah.” 

Ephesians 4: 13-15 until we all attain to the unity of the faith, and of the knowledge of the Son of God, to a mature man, to the measure of the stature which belongs to the fullness of Christ. 14As a result, we are no longer to be children, tossed here and there by waves and carried about by every wind of doctrine, by the trickery of men, by craftiness in deceitful scheming; 15but speaking the truth in love, we are to grow up in all aspects into Him who is the head, even Christ

 

Let's enjoy the variety of ways the LORD has shown Himself to one another. I think of it like a potluck.  We bring our best dish and share what we have.  Holding to His truth in love as we mature in Christ and keep Him head of the table.

 

 

Heaven and Our Son's Experience



Morning After



Our son, Sam has always had a thing with Jesus.  When he was only two years old I was reading a Little Golden Book about Jesus to him.  He would wave at the drawings of Jesus at every turn of the page.  I didn’t encourage him, he did it himself. 

Over the years (he is now eight) he has had a faith that is strong.  When his tummy hurt, he’d ask me to pray for it to be better and he’d walk away from me confident that it would be.  It would. 

In a car ride to go boating with friends, the sky got dark and it began to downpour and a storm seemed to be ending our plans.  He sat in his child car seat, folded his little hands, bowed his head and clenched his eyes tightly shut as he prayed asking God, "Please, make the storm go away."  The clouds parted and there were blue skies.  It impacted one of our friends in the car so much that he wrote a blog post about the faith of Sam. 

Our son has often said things that were always spot on at the moment needed. One of those times I was in quiet prayer early in the morning and asking the LORD to help me be more aware of giving.  Our son awoke  and walked up to me.  He said, “Mom, I’ve been thinking.  Giving to people is like giving to God.”

Last year, he really surprised us.  He said to our oldest daughter, “You are going to have a baby this year.”  My eyes bugged out and our daughter laughingly told him that she didn’t know how that would be possible.  She had been diagnosed in her teens as clinically sterile.  Just the month before he said this, she had been so sick from the complications of her condition that the physicians were recommending a hysterectomy.

Ten months later, our grandson was born.  

Sam doesn’t see himself as anything unusual.  This is normal to him.  This is part of his relationship with Jesus; believing and looking to Him and saying the things placed on his heart.  He says and does them without hesitation or questioning, because as a child’s faith is, it is without doubt and filled with expectation.

When he was around five he had a dream that Jesus was a lion and the Jesus-lion was laying on him while covering and protecting him from mean animals.  He said, “It was so loving; He loved me!  He roared at the others and they backed away and then He licked me, snuggled me and purred.  It felt so good!  It felt SO good!”  Sam had never heard of the Lion of Judah or had ever seen or read a one of C. S. Lewis' books about Narnia like the Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe yet.  I showed him a cover of one of those books later as we walked through a store and I asked him if Jesus looked like that kind of lion and he said, “Yes.”

 This week Sam came down with a high fever.  He was lethargic.  He has had many cycles of sickness like this that we had become accustomed to.  He would often miss a few days of school until it went away.  This time he found it hard to move and the fever seemed really high as I carried him to bed for the night.  I didn’t take his temperature so as not to disturb him more, but I went to bed very concerned.  The medicine wasn’t decreasing the fever and I was considering the number of sick days ahead.

The next morning I let him sleep and called the school saying he wouldn’t be there that day.  Shortly after, he came walking out of his room.  He said, “Mom, I’m healed!  I dreamed Jesus healed me!”  I jumped up and felt his head.  The fever was gone.  I asked if he still hurt anyplace and he told me, no.  He was well!

I asked what it was that he dreamed.  He said, “I was in heaven.  Jesus told them, ‘Sam is very sick and this makes Me sad.  I’m going to heal him.’  Then Jesus turned to me and said, ‘Be healed.’”

Asking him if Jesus put His hands on him, he told me, “No, He just said it. ‘Be healed.’” I was in awe.  I saw how happy Sam was and how bright his eyes were. 

Continuing to check on Sam and feeling his head, no fever came back.  He was certain he was healed and I had kept checking.  (I’m convicted of this now.)

Once I settled into this having happened, I asked Sam if he remembered anything else about his dream.  He exclaimed, “I remember lots of things!”  I eagerly asked him what.

He said, “There were lots of streets and they really ARE made of gold! Every road is gold!” 

“It was beautiful. BEAUTIFUL!” 

“There were lots of churches everywhere! Everything we like is there.  Everything!  There were Bibles everywhere and books and shops filled with Bibles and books!”

“I saw houses, lots of houses!  I saw the houses!! The houses are all SOFT!  You can sit anywhere and lay down anywhere in them and it doesn’t hurt because they are all soft!   He wants us COMFORTABLE!!”

“I saw our house!  It even said, ‘Willey House’ on it!”  His joy kept growing as he shared more and more.

“I saw Grandpa Willey.  He was partying!”  Sam laughed and he made a gesture of dancing.  “Grandpa said, ‘Hi,’ to me and then he went back to partying!”  Again, Sam laughed.

“Everything you LIKE is there, EVERYTHING!  I’m going to play floor hockey ALL OF THE TIME!” 

I was soaking in every word he had to say and held to his exuberance, certainty and authority in the way he said them.  Then I asked him who Jesus was talking to when He was telling them that he was sick and that Jesus was sad and that He was going to heal him.  He said, “He was talking to the angels!”

“There were so many angels!  An army of angels!  There were thousands, no, MILLIONS! It was an army of angels and they were all in front of Him!”  I asked Sam again what Jesus said to him and he again said, “Be healed.”

When Sam had shared about the angels I knew what he was talking about.  I hadn’t shared with very many others what he so freely shared with me.  I had been in prayer a couple of years ago at an ARC (Alliance of Renewal Churches) gathering and I had a vision.  Jesus was standing behind me with His arms around my waist and His head over my shoulder and along side my face as we stood facing forward.  In front of me was the army of angels facing forward, too.  They were lined up, row after row for as far as I could see.  They were in white and stood strong with broad, straight shoulders.  The air of strength and impenetrable protection overwhelmed me.

 I can still remember the fragrance of Jesus.  It was the most lovely, fresh and clean fragrance.  I had wept after seeing His angels and being embraced by His love like that; to feel Him and know Him that near.  Later, when I heard the song by Chris Tomlin, “Whom Shall I Fear” (God of Angel Armies) I knew exactly the truth of it.

One evening, on a different occasion, I was in bed and praying.  I opened my eyes and I saw gold overhead.  It was even lower than the ceiling of the room.  It was all gold, the most beautiful sparking gold.  I knew I was seeing the underside of heaven and I realized how near to us it is.  It’s just right there! 

This quote is a quote I received today by Graham Cooke and it sums this up well.

 “Ours is a life of resolute expectation.  God’s goal is that you would be fully persuaded, secure and unafraid in His steadfast love for you.”

Reminding our son of all the LORD has done to show him who He is and how He loves him, I pointed out the places in his dream of His protection, comfort, love, joy, power, sorrow for his suffering and power of His words of healing.  That the Bible matters and the Word of God is forever and that the words in other books that were there were words that passed with eternal and lasting value.

 I showed him how family mattered, that he saw a home with our name and we will be together again and we can have joy for those who get to go to heaven before us.  I told him to hold to these things because Jesus is giving him a strong faith by letting him know Him so well.  He readily and knowingly nodded through it all.

Jesus is also letting us know Him through the experiences that Sam has freely shared.  When we share, it is a giving and a gain for those who receive it. Sam and I hope that by sharing this, you will know how much Jesus loves you, too, and that Jesus is worth knowing now and for always.