Testing

Art use permission by Amanda Geisinger

 

 

Coming off of another rough year of uncertainty, cuts and threats and even verbal abuse in mine and my husband’s work situations, it has been a learning and growing process for us spiritually.

In the midst of what sometimes seemed like silence from the LORD, it was our seeking for Him that He desired.  I recently saw an image that read, “The teacher is usually quiet during a test.” Had He instantly rushed to our aid we would have thought less of Him being the one that provides it.  We wouldn’t have asked for His help, nor would we have seen our own weaknesses.  We wouldn’t have learned to come to Him in all things and trust in Him in these ways of challenges.  Also, we wouldn’t have seen our own weaknesses of where we were untrusting, afraid and the poor behavior in those things.   

Hardships bring about strengthening if we decide to hold to faith.  We are never left on our own; God doesn’t leave us. Test times in the Bible often show up in the number forty.  Forty years of wandering in the desert and then the Promised Land.  But, they still had some overcoming to do to gain that.  It rained forty days and forty nights before it stopped and the waters began to recede.  Four hundred years in exile was a forty times ten.

Jesus was tempted in the desert for forty days.   Matthew 4:1 Then Jesus was led up by the Spirit into the wilderness to be tempted by the devil.  That verse blew my mind the first time I read it.  He was purposely led by the Spirit to be tempted.  Tested.  It made some of my temptations and tests take on a divine purpose.  As exhausting and difficult as they were and are, they help me to become stronger and equipped.  Like I said, God also doesn’t leave us. Matthew  4:11 Then the devil left him, and behold, angels came and were ministering to him.

Exhausted by the testing and fasting, Jesus endured as one in our own human weaknesses, angels came to Him when it was over to strengthen Him and attend to Him.  Then Jesus began His ministry.  He had withstood the temptations and tests.  Graduation was His.

Hebrews 4:15 For we do not have a high priest who is unable to empathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are--yet he did not sin.

This is talking about Jesus.  He empathizes with us.  The last part, –yet he did not sin.  Ooph, how often have I sinned in following through with the temptation or the time I was so challenged by verbal abuse that I lied to keep from calling that person for fear of being abused again.  I detested what fear had driven me to do.  But, having gone through it, I am stronger.  I am aware of my weaknesses and more aware of God’s strength and what He can see me through when I hold to Him.  Tests show us what we know and don’t know. 

At the height of finals time for college students, I found an article written Nov. 10, 2013 by Stanford administrators for Stanford College students.  It was helping them relieve test anxiety.  It carefully reminded the students that their value is not diminished on how they performed, but that the tests are to help them see what they have learned and therefore strengthening their confidence in those matters as well as making them aware of areas that they may need to learn more in order to become stronger in it.  It categorized “learning deeply.”

1.What does it mean?

2.How does it work

3.Why is it important?

4.How does it fit with the other things I’m learning

As we endure those tests and hardships it’s like a faith work-out.  After some testing it has been exhausting, but I get restored by others or helped in the midst of it.  When that same type of test comes around again, I notice how much stronger I am.  My faith abs have become like steel, so to speak and it can be looked at as Stanford indicates “learning deeply.”

Enduring and learning from them allows us to learn the answers.  When someone else is going through the same type of tests in their life, it’s okay to share the answers you learned!  You just may be a “ministering angel” to someone else.  The other part is that like Jesus, we can empathize with them.  That in itself is a gift to one in the midst of trying to find the answers.  Empathizers do minister even if they don’t have exactly my answers, but can recognize the hardship and offer comfort and hope.

Ultimately, every test is an opportunity to draw nearer to the LORD.  Coming into His presence and place is perfect peace. Everything circumstantially can be more than we can handle, but when we put our faith in Him, the peace comes, strength comes and hope comes. 

When similar tests come back around again, the strength to face them and react more strongly in faith has blessed me to let me know how much He has grown me and strengthened me over that time.  I quickly fill in the blank with the answer I learned and see just how much He has taught me.  

When Mary returned to the grave site of Jesus, He had already risen and He made Himself known to her.

 

John 20:16 “Mary!" Jesus said. She turned to him and cried out, "Rabboni!" (which is Hebrew for "Teacher").

James 1:2-4 Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, 3 because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. 4Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.

-Special thanks to Amanda Geisinger for giving me permission to use her art.  She is a skate boarder and talented artist in New York City working for Nickelodeon and she has her own personal blog of art work.  She is intellectual with an ability to tell a simple story through her art.  Two of her personal comics are “Amanda Goes to Church” and the other, “ Amanda Stays In Church.”  She includes in the sub title that she was an atheist with a cross out insertion to An “former” atheist's assorted explorations of Christianity.

Asking permission for art use and photo use has been one of the most fun parts of my blogging.  The people I get to connect with have been outstanding!

 

 



 

 



Eyes On One

 

As Christmas nears, I am reading e-mails, messages, cards and posts. There is a sea of situations as unique as each life I am reading about. 

Anticipations of weddings, babies and first Christmas’ together.

There are those celebrating Christmas with the feeling of an absence of loved ones that no longer are with them. 

Some are deep in need of answered prayers.  A baby gasps for breath in a hospital, another’s brother is air-lifted on a heart-lung machine to Mayo, a toddler just diagnosed with stage 4 cancer at her routine check-up and now is suddenly leaving their home of Russia to get treatment in Cologne, Germany.

We pray.

There are those in treatment over-coming addictions, mental health being sought, and financial struggles to pay bills. There are the lonely and there are those that are surrounded by friends. There is the anniversary of cancer beaten and the celebration of new jobs miraculously given.

Praises are lifted by another set of parents whose child has returned home with breath again after weeks of being ventilated in the hospital.  Joy is expressed by friends and family returning home after long absences and the thrill of anticipation of loved one’s first-time visits.

Then there is a photo of a gentleman that has followed my Christian writings.  He lives in Ethiopia and he is standing with other Christian friends of his just outside of a prison wall. They are looking down upon blood that was shed at the door.  The photo needed no words. 

Lives lived, lives lost, but the hope of Salvation has come.

In this mix; cookies are being baked, prayers are being sought, Bible verses shared, friends stand together, gratitude for what is and hope for what will be; the people I am reading have one thing in common.  They all have their eyes on Jesus. 

They look to Him. They are thankful to Him. They place their hope in Him and know that love, grace, strength, peace and eternal life comes from Him. 

Our days have waves of highs and lows, but He is constant.  He came to us in a world needing Him and He is worthy of our praise.  Leaving the comforts of a throne to place His head in a manger, to be crowned with thorns, we are not forsaken.  Becoming "with us is God," the meaning of Immanuel, He did not remain separated from us, but took the sin that  separated us upon Himself to join us in this place and to bring us into His. 

His Kingdom come.

We are loved. 

This is Christmas. 

We look to One and there we find peace.

Psalm 29:11 The LORD gives strength to his people; the LORD blesses his people with peace

John 16:33 I have said these things to you, that in me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world

Isaiah 9:6 

For to us a child is born,
    to us a son is given,
    and the government will be on his shoulders.
And he will be called
    Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God,
    Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace.

More Than the Right Name

Coming through the line of the House of David, Jesus was prophesied He would be from David’s throne and family.

Enter Joseph of Nazareth.

There isn’t a lot told about Joseph. His family came from Bethlehem, so it was there that he needed to register.  He was returning because of his family line.  Apparently his family connections weren’t remembered or regarded to save him a room.

Joseph didn’t say words that were recorded. 

But, his actions spoke louder than words.

Who is this man that had the right lineage, but was also the right choice for God to call as an adoptive father for his Son?  What is it about him?  As God chose a father for His own Son, wouldn’t He want a father that would have similar characteristics as Him?

Matthew 1 begins reading that Mary was pledged to marry Joseph, but before they married, she was found to be with child.

Matthew 1:19 Because Joseph her husband was a righteous man and did not want to expose her to public disgrace, he had in mind to divorce her quietly.

Righteous is defined as following divine law.  It is also defined as “holy in heart.” Joseph did not want to follow the laws of the people that included public disgrace and the judgment of a stoning death for an unwed woman who was carrying a child who  happened to be the woman he was betrothed to.  Joseph, “holy in heart” did not want to shame her or disgrace her, but would spare her life and offer her grace. 

Joseph began to consider quietly divorcing her, but after he had thought that thought an angel of the Lord came to him and told him that the child  in Mary was conceived by the Holy Spirit.  The angel told him that she will give birth to a son and that His name is to be Jesus, which in Hebrew is Yeshua -YHVH Saves/delivers. The angel tells him that His name is this because he will save his people from their sins.

When Joseph woke up from the visitation of the angel he DID what the angel commanded him and took Mary to be his wife.  It reads that he had no union with her until she gave birth.  He had self-control and he honored her, God and the child.  When Christ was born, he gave him the name Jesus.

 Joseph lives Spiritually; responding to the Spirit.

He is obedient.

He is filled with grace.

He is merciful.

He is patient.

He honors.

He listens.

He adopts with the heart of a father as the Father has for us.

He is holy in heart.

After Jesus was born and they were in Bethlehem for a time, King Herod became threatened at the word of a new King that was born.  An angel appears again to Joseph and tells him to take Mary and the child and escape to Egypt and to stay there until Joseph is told to leave, because Herod is in search of the child and wants to kill him.

Matthew 2:14  So he got up, took the child and his mother during the night and left for Egypt.

Joseph immediately delivered the baby from death; moving during the darkness of night to provide safety and security.

He is a protector.

A deliverer.

A provider of safety and security even amidst darkness.

After Herod had died and the threat had passed, the angel appeared to Joseph again in a dream and told him to “Get up and take the child and his mother” and go to the land of Israel.  Again, Joseph got up and went, but when he heard that Archelaus, son of Herod was reigning in Judea in place of Herod from a warning in another dream.  Still as a man, it says he was afraid and he withdrew as he was warned and went to the district of Galilee and lived in a town called Nazareth.  So fulfilling what the prophets said, “He will be called a Nazarene.”

Joseph is responsive.

He is flexible.

He is mindful of their well-being.

This is the man Joseph, whom God called to be the adoptive father of Jesus.

In Joseph, we see the beautiful attributes of God’s own heart. 

Righteous is Joseph, holy in heart.

 

 

 

The Dietitian and the Farmer

Our daughter is a dietitian so her life revolves around food and many aspects regarding it.  Some of the aspects are how it is given, how it is received, nutrients that help in healing, strengthening and surviving and so much more. She makes sure that the food is safe and safely given. But most of all, that it is received.

There are the IV feedings, the tube feedings going directly into the stomach, the pureed, the soft food and no restriction diets.  One time she shared with me a lactation consultant’s instructions regarding a newborn and breast feeding.  They had said that the child will root and find its food source naturally.  That in their effort they enjoy it that much more and have a tendency to latch on better.  She told her that if a newborn is being “made” to eat, it is like shoving a hamburger into its face. 

A friend of mine that I admire very much raised a strong point and it caused me to consider his remark in this way of what is best received regarding one’s Christianity.  He had remarked that to him the example of a Christian in their being and actions spoke to him far more than one who professes their Christian faith.  He receives by their example. 

As he searches in understanding his own faith and where that lies, he is being shown much.  It is how he receives.  He is extremely intelligent and to tell him things is not how he receives.  He knows his level of what he has taught himself and learned on his own.  To hear others tell it to him is not how he receives.  He can take a knife and fork and cut his own steak.  He’s not going to have someone put it on a fork and then open his mouth for it.  Our son responds negatively when I put a piece of meat on his fork as he responds, “I can do it myself!” The people that I knew that liked my friend's comment regarding the preference for that kind of representation of faith are also people that share in his ability to learn and receive independently.

There are others that desire or need hand- feeding or are open to it when it comes to faith. Either they haven’t quite worked it out themselves or they are open to more and what others profess and the sharing helps them to gain or strengthens them.  There are those that can tolerate a variety of ways of being fed. 

Physically, I can feed myself, but at a nice restaurant, my husband will take a piece of what he ordered and feed me a bite on his fork so that I can taste it, too.  I receive it.  If my waiter did that to me, I’d probably turn my head away laughing.  If the waiter kept at it and I didn’t want it, I would probably become agitated.

Sometimes we receive better from people we know when it comes to professions of faith.  Sometimes we are so hungry and in need and don’t know how to get it that anyone that comes with a bit of guidance is hungrily received.  As ones who show their faith, we need to be considerate of the way people receive. 

The LORD feeds in different ways.  He knows how each one can receive.  When we look at the ways we do receive and see His hand in it, we know He knows us, too.  There is a Bible teacher that I can listen to time and again and I always take something in from her.  I know God uses her to reach me that way.

Some people receive from my writing and others don’t.  I know that God is using me for the ones that He knows receive this way.  I don’t get bent out of shape by the number of hits I have or don’t have.  It’s who He is drawing to this work.  It’s not about me, it’s about Him.  Surprisingly, I have noticed that 25% of the people reading my work lately are in Sweden.  I have no idea why.  Maybe they like this flavor or identify with me in the snow picture.

When I see the variety of denominations, pastors, T.V evangelists, volunteers, organizations and people in the name of Christianity purely serving, I see the varieties of the way He feeds.

My Mom grew up on a farm.  She saw the way that God feeds in different ways more so in her later years.  She had grown up thinking her denomination was the “it” way to heaven.  Then, she started to see the LORD as The Farmer.  The Farmer doesn’t feed the chickens the same way he feeds the cattle, or the sheep, or the hogs, or the young lamb whose mother was not feeding it.  Some grazed on their own, some had seed scattered about so they could pick and peck as they choose, some were given most everything at a trough and some were held and given a bottle of milk.  By reflecting on her denomination and the various denominations, she saw it as different ways of being fed. 

What I find universally is that most all religions find a need to make a sacrifice.  From tribes sacrificing children or virgins to those that put their best fruit in front of their idol, there are also people sacrificing themselves in a lifestyle of monk or nun. There is a belief that some sort of a sacrifice or offering needs to be made somehow because they have done wrong or are not up to the goodness of the one they are offering to or they want to give their very best to that one.

In Christianity there is so great a sacrifice made for all from the One we worship.  The sacrifice was made for everyone… the world. But as far as religions, only Christianity has that kind of God that is without ego, but will sacrifice and humble His state to be so personal and relational to come into our world with us and then be the sacrifice for us out of His love for us.  No other faith has that that I’m aware of.  No faith speaks of it prophetically coming and then fulfills it.  It is a life and blood sacrifice to make right and remove what we have as our knowing of our wrong and broken responses.  The knowledge between good and evil. 

The Blackberry Bush Course calls this, “Broken responses to impossible demands.” The course goes on to teach that as demands are placed on us, which are usually for our good, we can’t fulfill them and we respond in broken ways. “Don’t touch the stove, it’s hot. Be a good student”… don’t kick the ball in the house and the demands grow.  A response, “ I didn’t break the vase, it was my brother.”  We lie, or take or sneak or scheme or cover.  An early Bible example is Abel’s better sacrifice than Cain’s and Cain responded in a broken way by a demand that he didn’t meet. His broken response; he killed his brother.

 Only in God’s coming as Christ are we freed from this.  We need saving. How we receive that is the way He is going to feed us.  Some will by this writing, others won’t, some may have this as their appetizer, they who like it will take this and maybe offer it on a fork to someone they love. 

Sacrifice is the ultimate example of love.  A recent movie was released by Disney called, “Frozen.” It is largely themed on sacrifice and is a take on one of Hans Christian Andersen’s stories.  We gravitate towards this display of love.

 I know of a marriage that recently did not occur because each individual desired their own career path and had location needs.  Neither was willing to sacrifice their desire for the good of the other.  The love wasn’t there.  It is telling.  Love involves sacrifice and in Christ came sacrifice and love. 

John 15:12-15 My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you. 13 Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one’s life for one’s friends. 14 You are my friends if you do what I command. 15 I no longer call you servants, because a servant does not know his master’s business. Instead, I have called you friends, for everything that I learned from my Father I have made known to you

In this kind of love back to Christ we are willing to lay down our own ways for His ways.  To live a life that is like His.  In doing so, we need to present ourselves in a loving way and love one another.  Where Jesus spent most of His time keeping people in check was with the religious leaders and those who thought they were so good.

To love as He commands. 

How you show your faith or tell of  it will be the food for thought for another and maybe not for someone else, but God will present Himself in the way that they best receive through another or another way.  Be who you are, but be you through love and be sensitive and  loving to those who are fed in different ways.   

Psalm 34:8  Oh, taste and see that the LORD is good! Blessed is the man who takes refuge in him!

Can you Love?

 

Paul and Jan Crouch

 

 

Heart changes have come more frequently the older that I get.  There have been levels of forgiveness that I have come to that I didn’t think possible.  Forgiveness for myself and forgiveness in ways I hadn’t even realized needed to be addressed.

A few years ago I had prayed and asked the LORD to show me who I needed to forgive and who I held resentment for.  That is a loaded prayer!  The LORD reminded me of one person after another.

It wasn’t like I saw the actual person, but I would see look-a-likes.  People from decades ago and people that I held even minor resentments for.  Even people I didn’t actually know, but were public figures and I resented them for one thing or another. I forgave in my prayers each one that He reminded me of and I prayed blessings for them.  The freedom was instant, but even greater was what came in its place.  It was love.  Love filled the places that once held hurt, anger, judgment and resentment. 

I was loving like I never had before.  I was filled with love.

However, there were other places of judgment.  One area was when I would watch television evangelists.  An older woman that had been very successful in their ministry and Christian broadcasting had pink hair.  I was startled when I first saw the exaggeration of the size of hair and the color. (Hypocritical of me; I had once had really big hair) She and her husband co-founded Trinity Broadcasting Network and countless ministry venues.

When she spoke, she spoke as one that really knew Jesus and loved Him so completely.  I sensed the LORD say to me, “Can you love a woman with pink hair?”  I thought to myself how much He must love her and I knew yes, I can love her, too. 

I started praying blessings for her.  My heart had been softened for her and I felt tremendous love for her. 

This weekend her partner in life, love and ministry passed away.  They had recently celebrated over 40 years of their Christian broadcasting network.  Not long ago he had been in the hospital and was back on television with her.  She was so grateful and loving and praising God that he was well enough for them to be there together to celebrate. 

Today my heart weeps for her.  My spirit mourns for her loss and grieves.  Through tears and prayers this transformed heart shares her heartache and prays for this precious woman with pink hair that mourns her husband. 

Only by the love of Jesus and through Him could He move me like this to carry some of her heart-ache and pray so earnestly for her while tears stream down my own face.  The love Jesus has pours first in us and by His overflow we can love others. Sometimes that overflow is through our tears for them.  To be in Him also puts us to be in Him for others and desire His comfort and compassion with the sincerest of prayers for them.  Even for people we have never met. 

There is nothing like love. Living in love is a joy, even through tears of compassion.  Because that compassion is a glimpse of the love He has for us. He sees our hearts and knows the number of hairs on our head no matter what color they are. 

We are loved.

Ezekiel 36:26 NLT  And I will give you a new heart, and I will put a new spirit in you. I will take out your stony, stubborn heart and give you a tender, responsive heart.